For the Best
by kdzl
Summary: 6x05 Pre-Episode. DL Oneshot. Supporting Danny takes its toll on Lindsay. How does Danny respond?


_**AN/This is my first CSI: NY fic, so any suggestions are more than welcome. Written as a pre-ep to 6x05. **_

**_Disclaimer: I don't own the show or characters._**

* * *

Hawkes walked purposefully into the trace lab, never once looking up from the file he was holding. He and Lindsay were paired with a dead body found in the Hudson, and he might just have the clue that could break the case wide open. He looked up to see Lindsay seemingly lost in concentration. Her eyes were closed lightly and her head was resting lightly on her left hand.

"Lindsay?" He asked gently, not wanting to disrupt her focused train of thought. When Lindsay didn't respond, he tried a little more forcefully, "Lindsay?"

"Yeah?" Lindsay suddenly sat straight up and looked slightly startled. Blinking rapidly, she turned towards Sheldon. "Sorry, I--"

"Fell asleep?" Sheldon asked with a smirk. "I didn't know you found trace to be so boring. Or was it because of the late nights with Danny?" He asked, teasing suggestively.

Lindsay laughed lightly, "Well, considering my life right now, I'd say that trace is probably the least exciting thing on the planet."

Suddenly Sheldon was overcome with concern. Eying his young friend closely, he could see the dark circles that Lindsay tried to cover with makeup. "Everything ok?"

"It's fine." Lindsay laughed. "Just needed a power nap. Sorry. What did you find?"

* * *

"What are you still doing here?" Stella questioned as she walked in the break room to find Lindsay studying a lab report.

"Oh, I just can't get enough of this place." Lindsay deadpanned, "I was thinking of moving in, but the Storage Closets are just too small for my liking."

Stella smirked, but wasn't about to be deterred from her earlier question. "I thought you were going home hours ago, you've pulled doubles for the last week. I'm pretty sure you weren't scheduled." She said knowingly.

Lindsay shrugged, hoping to avoid Stella's interrogation.

"Lindsay, either tell me what's going on, or I'm going to tell Mac that--" Stella warned.

"It's nothing." Lindsay interrupted. "I just needed to pick up some extra hours."

Stella simply glared at the younger woman, attempting to gain further insight. Lindsay, however, continued to stare stubbornly at the report in front of her, avoiding Stella's look.

"Lindsay." Stella prompted, sounding far too much like Lindsay's own mother for the younger woman's liking. Seeing that Lindsay wasn't about to budge, Stella sat across from her and tried a different tactic. "You know you can talk to me." She said softly.

Lindsay looked up and smiled warmly. "I know, thanks." She said sincerely.

"So what's going on?" Stella asked. She could see the inner turmoil as Lindsay debated whether or not to divulge the secrets of he private life. "Is it Lucy?"

"Oh, no. Lucy's doing great. I think she's going to take her first steps in the next couple of days." Lindsay said happily.

"Good for her." Stella smiled. Lindsay only nodded and the pair fell into an uncomfortable silence.

"Is it Danny?" Stella asked after a moment, intent on uncovering just what was behind Lindsay's drive to remain at the lab.

"No." Lindsay said quickly._ Too quickly, _ Stella thought. Knowing what Stella was thinking, Lindsay quickly amended. "Danny's great. Physical Therapy's working and he is using a cane. A cane! We weren't sure he was ever even going to walk again, and now he's walking around with a cane."

"Really?" Stella asked with surprise. Danny had used his chair at work, and she had avoided continually pestering the couple as to his progress.

"Yeah, at first, he just used the cane at home where no one could see him." Lindsay smiled with the memory of seeing her husband standing with their daughter. She didn't think that she had ever been as proud of her husband as she had at that moment. "Then, we've started to go for walks around the block, and now I think when he comes in later he's going to try to go the whole shift." She practically beamed with pride.

"That's great." Stella said supportively.

Lindsay hoped for a moment that her 'good news revelations' would be enough to occupy Stella's mind to keep her from pressing any further. Lindsay cursed as Stella pressed once more. "So what's going on then?"

Lindsay sighed in defeat. She should have known that she couldn't fool Stella. "It's nothing really. It's just--" She stopped herself, not wanting to appear vulnerable or incapable. "It's nothing."

"Lindsay, you're working yourself to the bone, and you've got a young daughter to take care of at home. You can't fool me, kiddo. So, what's up?"

"I'm scared." She finally admitted.

Lindsay's admission took Stella aback slightly, but wanting Lindsay to open up, Stella prodded her to continue. "Of what?"

"Of everything." Lindsay replied. "I'm so glad that Danny's okay, and I wouldn't change the outcome of the shooting for anything."

"But?" Stella persisted.

"But our medical bills have piled up. A two week stay in the hospital isn't exactly something that insurance wants to pay for. We've got medical bills up to our ears--with Lucy being born and Danny's accident all in the same year, we maxed out our coverage."

"So, you're working day and night to try to pay medical bills?" Stella asked. She was so focused on her friend that she failed

"Yeah, I guess. And--" Lindsay paused, not wanting her friend to think less of her she stopped. She had already said to much.

"Lindsay, come on. Talk to me." Stella prodded.

"And I'm just tired." Lindsay confessed. "I can't sleep at night because every time I close my eyes, I'm terrified that I'm going to wake up and have this all be some horrible dream and Danny will be laying dead on the floor. I can't get over the sight of him lying beside me with his blood seeping through my fingertips as I tried to stop the bleeding. I just--I don't know what to do anymore."

"What do you mean?" Stella asked. With Lindsay's back to the door, Stella was able to see a figure standing in the doorway that if Lindsay had seen, she would have stopped her explanation instantaneously. Unable, and slightly unwilling, to stop her friend, Stella allowed Lindsay to continue.

"I mean, I just feel like it was such a miracle that Danny _survived_ let alone that he can walk again. I feel like--I don't know--like now I've got to do it right, because it could all come crashing down around me at any moment."

"Montana." A voice from behind startled the younger woman. She whipped around to find Danny standing with his cane in the doorway. Stella stood, and squeezed Lindsay on the shoulder before quietly leaving the room.

Lindsay turned back to her lab report, hoping to avoid this confrontation with her husband.

"Montana." Danny repeated, slipping into Stella's vacated seat. "What's that all 'bout?"

"How much of that did you hear?" She cringed. She didn't want to add to Danny's worries by confessing her own inability to keep things together.

"Most of it. So when did we start keeping secrets from each other?" He asked. "You're not sleeping?"

"Danny--"

"No Linds. You don't have to play Super Woman. Why didn't ya tell me this was bothering you so much?"

"I'm not trying to be Super Woman." Lindsay retorted. "Wonder Woman is better anyways." Lindsay she joked. Seeing Danny's smirk and continued glare, she sighed. "I don't know. Its just, you've got enough to worry about without me adding to it all."

"Babe, we're in this together. If you're worried about it, I probably _should _be worried about it. When did you decide that you were going to go it all alone?"

"I didn't." She defended, "I just wanted you to focus on getting better. I didn't want you to think of all the bills we've got to pay, or how our daughter is going to start walking soon and we're going to have to pay for--"

"Look, it's gonna be alright. I promise. We can take care of it." Danny promised.

"I know." Lindsay said with a sigh. "I just--I just don't feel like its enough."

"What?" Danny replied, perplexed. "Like what's enough? Us?"

"No." Lindsay assured him immediately before adding softly, "Its Me."

"Now that's bullsh--"

"Danny, I--" She interrupted and paused before getting to the crux of the problem, "I just feel like I should have done more. Like I should _do_ more. Here at the lab. With Lucy. And I'm exhausted and I don't feel like I can do it anymore, but I can't stand the thought of letting everyone down." She admitted.

Danny looked her straight in the eye. "You know what you need?"

"Breakfast?" Lindsay smiled.

"No. A kick in the ass." He felt a swell of pride as she fought the smile that threatened to light up her entire face. "You're a great mom. You're everything I ever wanted--everything I never knew I needed. And, I'm not leaving you. Ever. But," He smirked, glad to be on the other side of this conversation. "But if I have to believe in you, all by myself, I will."

She beamed softly at him before leaning forward and kissing him lightly. "I needed that."

"I know. We've just got to keep that ego of yours in control." Danny teased.

"Wiseass." Lindsay rolled her eyes playfully. She sighed once more, "But, I should probably go back to work."

"Nu-uh. You're going back home. To sleep--and play with our daughter." He said firmly, snatching the lab results out of her hands before she could protest.

"But--"

"Doc has already said he'd cover your shift, and I got Adam to cover you tomorrow. And I will cover you the day after. No problem. You just take the next couple of days." He kissed her once more before standing himself. After wincing slightly, he stood firmly. "Consider it a gift from your charming and handsome husband."

Lindsay smirked. "You mean cocky and conceited husband?" She laughed and paused before continuing, "Are you sure? I mean--"

"Linds, let me take care of you. Go home. Kiss Lucy. Send the sitter home and take a nap. Do all that crazy mom stuff that you mom's like to do."

"Oh, you mean like the laundry?" Lindsay scoffed playfully.

"Whatever floats your boat." Danny shrugged before walking slowly to the door. "Try not to miss me too much, though."

"No problem." Lindsay teased as she watched him walk away through the glass doors. For the first time in a long time Lindsay Monroe-Messer realized that everything just might work out for the best.


End file.
